In Loving Memory

Lenore Carlson Henninger

October 15, 1915 ~ April 21, 2008

Recently I received an e-mail from a friend in which I was asked to "sum her up" in one word. I found this task extremely difficult. We are, by nature, complicated and multi-faceted, and to describe a person with one word is to exclude so many more. I found myself recalling this e-mail these past few weeks as my grandmother struggled valiantly, honorably, against her final foe and I wondered what "one word" might "sum up" a person so grand and a life so well lived. It came to me in an instant. Love. I cannot think of another person who so exemplifies love as my grandmother did. Who loves life as much as she did. Who gives love as easily and unselfishly as she did. Who is as loved as she will always be. Love, pure and simple.

From the outside looking in, my grandmother did not have the easiest of lives. By all accounts, she enjoyed a happy childhood (perhaps with the small exception of the time she became sick from eating too many blueberries, thus causing an aversion to the fruit that followed her to the end of her life). She was the fifth and youngest surviving child of Swedish immigrants and my great aunt enjoyed lovingly teasing her from time to time about the fact that she was spoiled as the baby. However, tragedy befell the family with the death of her brother, Clarence when my grandmother was only 14. Over the next two years, she watched her mother fight, first heartache at the tragic loss of her son and then cancer. She lost her mother at the tender age of 16. My grandmother recalled being excused from high school every Friday in order to do the laundry for her father and brothers. One could not mistake the resolute pride in her voice as she spoke about "doing what had to be done" and helping her family in this way.

Upon graduation, my grandmother met the love of her life, my grandfather, when she caught the eye (and the fancy!) of the young piano player at a dance club called the Rose Garden. Theirs truly was a match made in heaven. In addition to identical birthdays, they shared the same plucky, happy go lucky spirit. I never witnessed a cross word between them. Their marriage spanned well over 50 years and produced two daughters and a lifetime of happy memories.

I am one of five incredibly blessed people to call her Grandma. She was the type of grandma that fairy tales and happily ever after stories are made of. Hers was the house I chose when childish notions of "running away" from home occurred. After she would obligingly come to pick me (and my packed bag) up, I knew I would always find a sympathetic ear and a good snack around her kitchen table. She had the gift of making all seem right in the world again. And she always had orange circus peanuts and a cookie jar full of (store bought, vanilla sandwich) cookies to eat. That kitchen table was the center of my grandma's home and the place my heart still yearns for in times of trouble. She never missed a band performance, school play or sporting event that her grandchildren were involved in. When my family's home was struck with lightening and required major re-building, my grandparents took us in for almost a year. My grandma did most of the cooking and also took care of the three children during the long hours my parents spent working and overseeing renovations to our home. While we were definitely a bit cramped in space, I remember that time as a very happy one. My grandmother always let me crawl in bed with her after my grandfather would leave for work. It was the safest place on earth.

My grandmother rejoiced with the addition of each of her 6 great-grandchildren. She kept a picture of each of them on a shelf that she could see as she ate her meals. She enjoyed hearing about each of them and relished the time she spent with them. Just last week as I visited with her, I told her again of our plans to adopt our second daughter from China. Although communication with her was difficult, she smiled when I talked of our adoption and I know she was so happy.

In addition to her family (and all of our extended activities), my grandmother was active in many church activities and a member of the Fireman's Ladies Auxiliary. For a time she enjoyed participating on a bowling team. She had the easy ability to laugh at herself and the absurd situations life throws our way at times. She often told me that I needed to "keep my head up and a smile on my face." Simple words with profound meaning that I have come to rely on more and more with each passing year.

Today I lost one of the most special people in my life. I am relieved to know her suffering here on earth has ended. I am comforted by the fact that at this very moment she is in the loving embrace of her family and my grandfather and countless friends who have been waiting for her.

Surely angels dance tonight in heaven ~ for my dearest loss is their most precious gain.

Rest in peace, Gram. Rest in peace.